The Eyes of a Beautiful Beast

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Laura Tubbs

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We frolicked all summer in the long days’ sunlight
The rays shining on his glowing skin
Golden hair dancing
Surrounding his face

I felt drawn to his strength
It pulled me away from my broken home
Strong enough to hold me together

When he told me he was leaving
Getting on the train with the circus that brought him to me
I begged him to stay
Get a job here and move on from that way of life
A sad refusal followed, as well as hopelessness
When I told him I loved him
I insisted it would be worth it
No matter what life we live
We could be happy and free
As long as we were together

His gleaming eyes looked deeper than just my saddened face
But into my soul
Their green light penetrated me
Making a mark on my heart

I turned and cried
Silent, he stood and bowed to me
Forever, but not always he said

On the final evening without him, I filled into the massive tent
Stripes of rainbow colors folded in on me
I followed families, couples, and children with stars in their eyes
Music, beams of silver light lay out a path ahead
I sat
Surrounded by enlivened people

I promised I’d come to support him
Support the work that took him from me
But brought him to me

The show’s magnificence could not overcome my sorrow
The trapeze artists’ incredible feats dulled
The elephants remarkable intelligence softened

As a finale, an incredible lion emerged
Everyone on the edge of their seats
His strong legs and paws dug into the sandy path to his circular cage

He performed as the trainer told him
And the crowd awed at his beauty
But I felt pity
My heart broke for his lack of freedom
His inability to feel the wind against his free body
Nevertheless he looked confident, as if his life had been fulfilled

He stopped in front of me
Just bars and several feet between our faces

Then it dawned on me
The moonlight never hit him
This was not beast, but a man
An animal form, yet the same soul resided there
Trapped in a never ending cycle
A nightly transformation
Kept secret just long enough for me to fall in love with it

He bowed, as if to the crowd, but his green eyes were on me
Although he was silent
As a mighty lion should be
He communicated through his movement and gaze.
That he was ok
And that we could be together
Forever
But not always

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